You Can’t Fix Stupid: Man Attempts $10 Million Lawsuit For Falling Asleep At Yankees Game

Ron White said it best when he said that you can’t fix stupid. Stupidity runs rampant when you look at all the different warning labels that now need to be placed on every single item that is ever produced. If you look hard enough I’m sure there’s a TV somewhere that says you can’t eat it and it had to be put there because someone somewhere had to try to take a bite out of their Vizio. That’s the society we live in.

Our society is also lawsuit happy. If you look at someone the wrong way today, you might get served papers. Or if you talk about a fan that was sleeping at a Yankees game, you might get sued for $10 million.

Yep. This fan, Andrew Robert Rector, was sleeping at the April 13th Boston Red Sox – New York Yankees game, ESPN cameras caught him, the announcers did a little verbal jousting, MLB put it up on YouTube and now Rector is suing every damn party involved for $10 million dollars due to an ‘unending verbal crusade’.


I don’t know where to begin. This whole endeavor baffles me to no end. Let’s start here:

Some bozo went to law school and accepted this case. Someone with a degree came to the conclusion that they could beat the powers of ESPN and MLB in court on a case where a guy fell asleep at a baseball game. Good luck, buddy.

Let’s go to the guy that fell asleep. You paid good money, they tell me it’s a lot of money to get into Yankees Stadium, and you fell asleep. That’s on you. You don’t think anyone is going to see that you are asleep? It’s a Yankees game, in the biggest city in the nation, on one of the most watched TV networks, on the biggest night for TV viewing. I’d be more impressed if no one caught you.

Here’s the big problem I have: $10 million.

I get it. People are stupid and will slap you with a lawsuit for stupid things like this, but nobody’s, NOBODY’S, reputation is worth $10 million dollars. I could say the most horrible things about anyone from Miley Cyrus to the President of the United States and neither of them would win a $10 million settlement. No judge would ever allow that.

Andrew Robert Rector, ESPN pointing out your falling asleep did nothing to you. Sure, your friends and your cousins called you and called you a dummy for falling asleep at the Yankees game. Maybe the cute girl in your building saw it and kind of giggled the next time she saw you, maybe, but that’s it.

This chapter in your life did not keep you from getting a job. It did not hinder you from walking down the streets of New York. It did not hinder you from living your life. Frankly, this lawsuit is making your life worse. If you ever apply for a new job, your new potential employer will google your name and it will pop up that you tried to get $10 million from falling asleep at a baseball game.

I’m sorry if this just adds to the ‘unending verbal crusade’, but I think if Ron White was here he’d say something to the effect of… ‘Sue me.’

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